Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Melancholy

It's not a special day.

It's not even an especially bad day.

On the drive home from Walmart (milk, cheese, lettuce...) my thoughts turn to Sam.

I hear his cheeky laughter. I see him - heat-less, life-less, motion-less.

A cold hand slips around my heart and squeezes and I hurt, I hurt, I hurt, I hurt, I hurt...

We're stopped at the road works - windows down, warm breeze, sun on our faces.

Laura leans over and wipes a couple tears off my cheek.

Inhale... Exhale...

Life continues, without him.

It doesn't stop hurting, we just learn better pain management.

Death sucks.

4 comments:

annie said...

Hey Ames, love you, miss you, sorry that the pain is still there and will be until your together again.
ann

Jill said...

it's something I cant' possibly understand. but i can cry for you.. and pray. if there's one thing i've learned in the last few years it is that a mother's love never ends. you might fail on patience or laughter or any number of things, but love is that ever connected bond.

Deana-Andrew's mom said...

((((((((((((hug)))))))))

Totally understand. It sucks butt doesn't it?

The Animated Woman. said...

No words...